This week, I launched my little gift book, Do Your Laundry or You’ll Die Alone: Advice Your Mom Would Give if She Thought You Were Listening. I’ve done dozens of media interviews recently, having to explain the scary title and answer to a few judgmental talk show hosts about why I gave my daughter a laundry pass so many times that at age 18 she had to be threatened to wash her own clothes.

A few moms will relate to my reasons: 1) She was busier than I was; 2) I cared more than she did; and, 3) every once in a while, kids say ‘thank you’ in ways that make doing their laundry a sweet privilege.

Here is one of those I got this week. An ‘Open Letter to My Mom,’ posted on her blog column. You might need a tissue.


  1. Sharon Greenthal April 5, 2014 at 11:19 am - Reply

    I loved doing my kids laundry right up until they left for college. I even wrote a blog post about it a few years ago. Now they do their own.

  2. Carol Cassara April 5, 2014 at 5:44 pm - Reply

    Ok, so I’ve always loved doing laundry. Just sayin’.

  3. Grown and Flown April 24, 2014 at 1:06 pm - Reply

    Becky, that was a wonderful, awesome-in-every-way letter. Thanks for the kleenex warnings

  4. Pandamom April 24, 2014 at 1:12 pm - Reply

    Mine did her own laundry from the time she was about 12. White uniform shirts were often gray but I was the one who turned an entire load red once. So that’s probably why she decided to do her own. Now she brings her laundry to my house to do so we can visit and she can save money. What I DID do was make her a hot breakfast every morning I possibly could, and pack her a good lunch. Food for the brain, I guess was my thinking. She is about to graduate college Summa Cum Laude, and still tries to get breakfast hot on campus even though she lives off. The letter from your daughter was Wonderful. Mine would totally relate to the stiletto heels :)

    • Becky Blades April 25, 2014 at 11:00 am - Reply

      Wow, Pandamom. Good job! What a great way to bond – over the laundry. I’ll be quoting you.

  5. Carol Cassara July 7, 2014 at 9:38 am - Reply

    I remember this & like it as much now as i did then. Lovely.

  6. Kim Tackett July 7, 2014 at 9:38 am - Reply

    Mine are 20 and 26 and I would do their laundry (and still do when they’re visiting, if needed) if they toss it in with mine. I don’t fold it though…same for my husband. We have many, many laundry baskets, and they overflow.

  7. Ellen Dolgen July 7, 2014 at 9:45 am - Reply

    Laundry and tears….good way to start off the day!

    • Becky Blades July 7, 2014 at 6:53 pm - Reply

      Oh, Ellen. Indeed. I’m afraid a few mornings of laundry and tears are in my future as I launch my girls.

  8. Ruth Curran July 7, 2014 at 1:26 pm - Reply

    I did the laundry because, if I didn’t, it would take over the world. We had a rule — if it bothers you, pick it up, clean it up, or take care of it. My tolerance was much lower than my son’s and now that I know what a bright young man he’s grown !into, I can’t help but think that might have been strategic.

    • Becky Blades July 7, 2014 at 6:50 pm - Reply

      Exactly, Ruth. Laundry WILL take over the world if we don’t keep it in check. Just so hard to teach kids that.

  9. Jackie July 7, 2014 at 4:33 pm - Reply

    Well, SCREW the laundry — and the explaining about it! You did good and you’ve got a letter to prove it! Kudos to you — and to your lovely daughter. :)

    • Becky Blades July 7, 2014 at 6:49 pm - Reply

      Thanks, Jackie. I think SCREW THE LAUNDRY should have been the last page of the book.

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do your laundry or die alone author becky blades

Becky Blades, Author of Do Your Laundry or You’ll Die Alone, and contributor to Huffington Post,, Scary Mommy, and Grown & Flown.